Author’s Note:

Recently, I wrote a post about a record store experience that made me recognize and appreciate the process and journey that I am on. That post sparked a second post about how and why I decide on an album purchase and what that taught me about engaging with God in deeper ways. Now, I find myself in the midst of a series on things my record collection is teaching me about God, purpose, and the journey we are on. This series has continued to show me that God is always speaking and we just need to continually watch and listen for Him. As I have attempted to make listening for Him a regular practice, He has shown me more through a simple stack of plastic than I would have ever guessed. Thanks for following along. Here is part 3 of “Here for the Vibes.”

No Skips

In my last post, I shared that I only purchase albums that I enjoy in their entirety. While this high standard has led to an ability to more fully connect with the artist and the music as a whole, that is not where the practice originated. It’s actually much less profound than that. The truth is, the reason I have this standard for album purchases is not artistic in nature at all. It was actually all about convenience and saving time. This standard came to be because of the simple fact that record players do not have a “skip” button.

As much as I love the warm and vibrant sound of a record, I find the fact that there is no “skip” button to be extremely bothersome. If you want to skip a track on a record, you have to lift the needle and find the exact spot on the album where there is a break between tracks. Then, you have to carefully set that needle into the exact groove. It’s just south of impossible. So for me, rather than risk the frustration of missing that groove or the danger of scratching my records with the slighest miscalculation, I drop the needle on the outer rim and settle in for an opportunity to experience the work from top to bottom.

Here’s the thing, while most of the albums I have are worthy of playing start to finish, there are a few misses that sneak their way on to even the greatest albums. I’m looking at you Fleetwood Mac. You know what you did on ‘Rumors.’ That album features many truly great songs. But there are a couple that make me wonder who won a fight with the rest of the band and how. Don’t get me wrong, I love the album, but I also know when the best time to get up and go to the restroom is.

This situation makes me think about relationships and how we can tend view them. The truth is, there is no perfect album. Even the best albums have a song or two I still wish I could skip. And even in my pickiness, I have to learn to be somewhat flexible and have grace for those moments. Aren’t all relationships this way? I doubt I’ll find any argument or shock when I say that there are no perfect parents, siblings, friends, coworkers, neighbors, bosses, spouses, or extended family. It just doesn’t work that way. On every album, there are peak moments in which you are all in and the music makes your heart come alive. There are also the lower moments where you just aren’t connecting with the song and you want to skip to the next track.

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In those moments, it can be tempting to shut it down, turn off the album, and move on to the next. However, I know more great songs are coming next. So, Sometimes I take the opportunity to make a quick restroom run, maybe chat with some people around the office, and let that one play out. Other times, I stay and listen to see if there is something that I missed or something that I can find that will help me love this song, or at least like it a little more. Usually, when I stay and engage, I can find something worth celebrating.

In the same way, when we walk through seasons of relationship that aren’t as much fun, that are awkward, or difficult, we have to remember that there are good moments coming on the other side. There is beauty on the other side of the challenge that is worth waiting for and fighting for. So, how do we respond in those moments? Well, maybe it makes sense to take a little break. Sometimes all we need to do is step away from a conversation or a moment to collect our thoughts, clear our heads, or examine our own posture. Often, that’s just the break we need to empower us to come back together and pursue restoration. Stepping away from an album at a low point allows me to focus on what I actually like about it and build anticipation for the great song that’s right around the corner. In the same way, taking a short break from a difficult or tense relationship moment often reminds me of my love for the person and how glad I am to have them in my life. It allows me some mental rest and gives me the strength I need to fight for the relationship.

As good as a short break can be, there are other times when we need to stay in the moment and see it through. Just like the songs that I don’t love, sometimes it makes more sense to engage with it and look for something that I may have missed, to seek a deeper understanding of what the artist was trying to say, and look for something worth celebrating. In our relationships, we are rarely in complete or total disagreement with the other party. So, start by identifying the things on which you do agree. Focus more on what you have in common than on what divides and build from there. There are songs in my collection that I didn’t like at first listen, but have sense become favorites. When we are willing to truly listen and pay closer attention to those around us, we will often find incredible things that connect us to the very people with whom we thought we shared nothing in common.

How are your relationships going? Are you in a place where you wish you could hit skip? Much like record players our relationships just don’t work that way. The only way to get to the other side of a conflict or awkward situation is to walk through it. If you need a break to refocus, go for a walk around the neighborhood, talk to a friend or counselor, or take some time to dive into God’s word. If you need to take a closer look to discover something you may have missed, ask some good questions, truly listen to the other party, or celebrate the things you have in common. After that, commit to push through to the other side and get back to the parts of the relationship that captured your heart in the first place. If the album is still playing, there are more great songs on the way. Fight for your relationships and know that when everyone involved is willing to do the work, the best days are ahead.

Notes:

*This post is part of a series of posts called “For the Record.” This series is all about what I have learned through the hobby of collecting vinyl records. “For the Record” captures the heart of what the “This Awesome Life” blog and podcast is all about; hearing God speak through everyday moments. Use the links below to read the other posts in this series:

Part 1: The Thrill of the Hunt.
Part 2: Going All In.
Part 4: No Turning Back
Part 5: Weight for It
Part 6: Setting the Record Straight