Every Thursday I feature a “throwback” post from my blog archive. The goal is to look back and discover new lessons or opportunities to grow. This week, we’ll look at “Sometimes There’s a Wall.” You can view the original post here. For today, here’s a quick recap and a few more thoughts about how we respond to setbacks.
As I look at my life, it’s not hard to recognize the seasons that take place. Sometimes you’re thriving. Sometimes you’re struggling. And sometimes you’re somewhere in between. What makes this even more interesting, is that different areas of your life can occupy different seasons. You can be spiritually thriving while physically struggling. Your family relationships can be in a peak situation while the rest are running low. You can be extremely productive at work all while lacking focus and intentionality in personal areas. While all of these areas coexist, they’re not completely interdependent.
In the original post, “Sometimes There’s a Wall,” I talk about the concept of hitting a mental wall or setback. In that story, I went from a peak situation to a low point almost overnight. In that situation, I needed to rest and refocus. I needed to take a day off, allow my body to recover, and then get back to pursuing my goals. Sometimes, it’s that easy. You take a nap, have a snack, and get back in the game*. But what about when it’s not that simple? What about when you’re in a season that doesn’t allow you to disconnect? Maybe there are tiny humans in your home that need constant attention and focus. Maybe you are caring for an aging parent, and you can’t take a day off. Maybe you just started a new business or a new job and you haven’t figured out the rhythms just yet. How do you find the time to rest and refocus when the demands are constant and immovable?
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The first step to overcoming these walls should always be an honest evaluation of the season you are in. There is something inside of us that makes us believe that everything we have our hands on is of the utmost importance. Scripture says that the Lord has “set eternity in the human heart” (Eccl. 3:11) and I believe this truth is always at play in the back of our minds. But, while eternity is set in our hearts, not everything we do is of eternal significance. Honestly, a lot of what crowds our hearts, minds, and our schedules isn’t even of moderate significance. So, honestly evaluate the season you are in and ask yourself, is this “constant and immovable” demand actually of high importance? If not, maybe you can let it go after all.
Second, remember that some progress is better than no progress. Too often, I set my sites on perfection. One of my mentors says that perfection is a poison pretending to be a vitamin. We can easily get caught up in thinking if it can’t be perfect, then we have failed. But the truth is, we don’t have to be perfect, we just need to show up. You’ll never be the perfect parent, caregiver, boss, employee, husband, wife, father, mother, etc. Human perfection is not a thing. We shouldn’t aim for perfection. Instead, we should firmly set our sights on progress. In 2 Corinthians 3:18, the apostle Paul reminds us that we are being transformed into the image of Christ. We are constantly learning, growing, and being made new. The operative word here is “being.” There is no “done.” In a season that feels overwhelming, reframe what success looks like, let go of perfectionism, and aim to be just one percent better than yesterday.
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Finally, take one step at a time. Last year I went to a kid’s ministry conference, and I learned a lot. I had a notebook filled from cover to cover with ideas and new initiatives I wanted to implement. I stared at that notebook for weeks overwhelmed by its contents and the work it would take to get from where I was to where I wanted to be. Finally, I had an opportunity to talk to a coach and shared my overwhelm with her. She told me something so simple and yet so impactful. She said, “You don’t have to do it all right now. Just go after one thing at a time.” At first, I was discouraged. That meant this will take months if not years to get where we need to go. I shared that frustration with her, and she reminded me of a hard truth. In my current state, I was going nowhere. I was completely stuck in this overwhelmed state. She then, very lovingly, pointed me back to the truth that progress beats perfection. Am I there yet? No. Have I made strides toward the goals? Absolutely. I am way farther ahead than I would have been if I tried to formulate a plan to implement everything all at once. Too often we compare ourselves to the end goal when we need to be comparing ourselves to yesterday. Where were you yesterday? Are you farther along? Celebrate that progress. Are you behind? Give yourself some grace and get back in the game.
To be honest, this post is 100 percent for me right now. Over the last few weeks, I have taken a bit of a step backward when it comes to my goals, my focus, and my productivity. I’ve been running pretty hard and could most likely just use some rest. Thankfully, I’ve been able to make some great pockets of time for that recently and can feel the difference. However, I am entering another busy few weeks and I know that rest will be in short supply for the time being. But, as I look back, I can see the progress I have made over the last few months. I can see that I am so far ahead of where I was and so much closer to where I want to be. Now, I just need to recommit to taking one step at a time and celebrating the growth that is happening. I’m not called or expected to be perfect. I am called and expected to become more and more of who I am designed to be each day.
What about you? Which of these steps do you need to put into practice today? Make a plan that allows you to move forward one step at a time.
*It’s amazing what a nap and a snack can do. Check out the story of Elijah from 1 Kings 19.
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